"I hate this." "I hate that." "I hate (animal name, sports team, type of food)." "I hate you." "I hate."
Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines hate as (a) intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury; (b) extreme dislike or antipathy.
What a more wonderful world this would be with less of the word hate. Instead of saying hate we should say dislike. Often when someone hates something, they do not understand it. The best way to conquer hate is to learn more about what you dislike.
I am not too keen on snakes. I use to say that I hate snakes, but a wise person that I know pointed out that people hate things that they do not understand. So the more you learn and understand, the less you dislike something. Granted I will not touch a snake, but I also am not as afraid of them as I once was. They have a place in this world just like we do. They are an essential part of the food web and help to keep other animals in check. No animal is good or bad. They are just doing what they were created to do, survive.
I use to say that I disliked peas and a lot of people will admit to hating them. We had canned peas quite often growing up and I honestly can't stand them when they are squishy and smelly. But over time, I have discovered that I like fresh or frozen peas. Try a food a few different ways before you totally write it off. Same goes true with something that you entirely disliked as a child, our taste buds change and as an adult you might just like it.
Anger is another reason that someone says the word hate. Sure if you have an exceptionally rough day, you could say "I hate this day." But is that really going to fix anything? Tomorrow is always a new day, a fresh start. If you keep that anger bottled up inside it will bleed into the next day. Not everything can be fixed. Not everything is meant to be easy. If you make a mistake, acknowledge it and then try again. It is not always easy to admit that we were wrong, but it does allow us to bounce back faster.
Here is a big one, what we say and do rubs off on our children. When a child says "I hate (so and so)." We need to stop and take the time to talk with that child. Just because someone looks different, acts different, or sounds different does not mean that they should be written off. We need to get to the root of the issue and find out why the child feels that way. We need to reinforce that even if someone is treating us unkindly or we dislike someone, that they are still a person. We all make mistakes and we need to be kind to one another. Walk away from the situation, find an adult if they need to, but don't react negatively. The second child is always the one to get caught getting into mischief and sometimes the first one walks off scott-free. Of course talking with a child about this type of stuff is easier said than done.
I am trying to lessen the amount of time that my children and I say the word hate. It is harder than it looks at times and we occasionally fall back into the trap. But I think that in the long run we will be much happier in using the word dislike and will gain more knowledge about why we might not like something.
Will you take the challenge and try to limit the amount of times you say the word hate?
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